Thursday, June 05, 2008

My Ideal Day by Tom Slobhard

10 hours sleeping
3 minutes sex
2 hours cooking and eating
3 hours on my computer
2 hours watching a good film on telly
1 hours watching good quality comedy on telly
1 hours coffee break in the morning chatting with friends
1 hours gardening
2 hours horsework
1 hours sort of meditating
1 hours doing odd jobs/pottering

See I knew it, there is just not enough time in the day!


  1. I suggest that you combine 2 of the activities.
    That should start an interesting discussion about which two.

  2. 27 hours comprise your day?LOL And hmmm, no time for sleeping eh?

  3. oops sorry, you did say 10 hours of sleeping. LOL

  4. 3 minutes sex???
    2 hours telly???
    Another hour telly???
    1 hour meditating???

    Why don't you follow Vicus advice and try this combination:
    3 hours sex watching telly.
    3 minutes meditating about that and -YES!-then, 10 hours sleep, hahaha. ;)

  5. Vicus, I am a man - I only do one thing at a time.

    Sweet Grass - thank you for visiting my blog. Please note, I am a man - I said 3 minutes, not 3 hours.

    Sweet Leni - I might try your suggestion, although 3 hours is a bit of a marathon, and I'm not sure my wife would take kindly to her viewing being compromised.

  6. You mean she keeps her eyes open?

  7. 3 minutes??? Goodness Tommy dear. I think you need to switch some things around. For Mrs. Tommy's sake. :)

  8. I agree with Pam, that is far too much to inflict on any human being.
    To be fair:
    a) it does include foreplay
    b) we are only inferring that the unfortunate victim is always Mrs Tom.

  9. So Pammy, you are happy with the rest of my day - you just think the sex goes on too long yeah?

    Vicus, I guess I could save a minute or so by cutting out the foreplay.

  10. Tom, be careful with what you cut out from these 3 minutes or you will become a monk (a strange change for an old hippy, I think).

    Maybe you should ask your Mrs. -she will be of valuable help setting up your daily schedule with some more quality time and less sleeping time, sleepyhead!-.
    ;) lol

  11. you need less sleep as you get older, and dump the odd jobs aswell, increase the 3 minutes to 5 and you'll probably pass as normal.

  12. Three minutes of sex? Pretty good staying power for a man. I was right to give you that Mr Loverman award way back when.

  13. You forgot to mention how much time you plan to spend in shithouses... or is that part of your meditation time? :)

  14. Ooops sorry, I am always a victim of optical illusion i'm beginning to suspect i'm some sort of a dyslexic..LOL or just slow..

    I don't know what to say about the 3 minutes sex.. I thought it usually takes more than 3 minutes *scratches head*


  15. Seems like we're all worried about your 3 minutes, Tom. I hope you're not in the middle of your 10 hours now, sleepyhead! Wake up!

  16. Ziggi, 5 minutes! god, you're sooooo demanding.

    Betty, Glad to see you live in the real world.

    Kindness, ah yes, you are right. I forgot the 15 mins a day I spend in the loo - Jeez, no wonder time is at a premium.

    Grass, you 'thought' sex lasts longer than 3 minutes. It probably depends who you are having it with. Like Vicus says, if it's with me you would be probably be relieved its only 3 minutes lol.

    Leni, I got your number, Miss Spanish Girl. If I leave my schedule to the mrs then I'd probably be lucky to get two minutes.

  17. In that order?
    You would have to get up at about 3 am!?

    Forget about all of that Sting type tantric 3 hour sex...honestly.
    If you do it right it only takes three minutes..OH unless you're doing it with someone else. then add 2 minutes for disrobing, neatly folding your clothes on the bed, and placing the agreed amount on the bedside table in plain view.

    I hope that this helps.

  18. Oh yes, my exboyfriend the bullfighter -who was used to run away from the bulls- needed only 1min 30 secs. Maybe this is why I dumped him. Give me a break!

    Olé olé. ;)

  19. Anonymous15/6/08 09:40

    0nly ten hours sleeping?

  20. It looks like it's not only 10 hours.

    Don't tell us you've been busy, Tom, it's not nice to have your readerships waiting while you're sleeping all day long. That old trick won't work, LOL.